Classic and Contemporary Poetry: Explained

Alicia Suskin Ostriker's poem "Insomnia" poignantly captures the restless, often agonizing experience of sleeplessness, revealing how the darkness of the night can amplify the fears and insecurities that lurk beneath the surface of consciousness. Through the use of vivid imagery and a conversational tone, Ostriker delves into the inner turmoil of a sleepless mind, exposing the layers of self-doubt, fear, and existential anxiety that come to the fore when the world is quiet, and the self is left alone with its thoughts.

The poem begins with a direct and unsettling admission: "But it's really fear you want to talk about / and cannot find the words." This line immediately sets the tone, suggesting that the speaker's insomnia is not merely a physical condition but a manifestation of deeper psychological distress. The inability to articulate these fears leads to self-directed scorn, as the speaker jeers at themselves and labels themselves a "coward." This harsh self-criticism reveals the speaker’s frustration with their own vulnerability, as they are unable to confront or even fully understand the fears that plague them.

The repetition of "unable to sleep, unable to sleep" emphasizes the relentlessness of insomnia, where the mind becomes trapped in a loop of anxious thoughts. The speaker's thoughts are described as "buzzing away" on the mattress, a metaphor that conveys the incessant, almost mechanical nature of worry, which prevents the mind from finding peace. The presence of "two pillows and a quilt, they call them comforters" highlights the irony of these objects, which are meant to provide comfort but fail to do so. The suggestion that "comfort can be bought / and paid for" underscores the futility of material solutions to existential problems. No matter how plush the bedding, it cannot soothe the deeper anxieties that keep the speaker awake.

The poem then shifts to describe the surroundings of the sleepless night: "your two walnut chests of drawers snicker, the bookshelves mourn / the art on the walls pities you." This personification of inanimate objects reflects the speaker's sense of isolation and the way their mind projects its own self-reproach onto the environment. Even the comforting presence of "the man himself beside you / asleep smelling like mushrooms and moss" is "never enough" to dispel the speaker’s fears. The earthy, natural imagery associated with the sleeping partner contrasts with the speaker’s disquiet, emphasizing the gap between the speaker's internal turmoil and the external world of physical comfort.

The "traffic noise like a vicious animal / on the loose somewhere out there" further amplifies the sense of unease, transforming a mundane sound into something threatening. This metaphor suggests that the speaker's fears are not confined to the mind but seem to pervade the entire world, making even the outside environment feel hostile. The speaker's admission that they "brag to friends you won't mind death only dying" reveals a defense mechanism, an attempt to downplay the fear of mortality by focusing on the act of dying rather than the state of being dead. However, the speaker immediately undercuts this bravado by calling themselves a "liar," acknowledging that the fear of death is intimately tied to other fears—of rejection, physical pain, losing one’s mind or eyesight—each of which contributes to the overall sense of dread.

The final lines of the poem bring these fears together, likening them to "Pawprints of this! Hair snarls in your comb." These images suggest that fear leaves traces everywhere, in the small, seemingly insignificant details of daily life. The "glowing clock the single light in the room" becomes a symbol of the speaker’s isolation, the lone witness to their sleeplessness and anxiety. The clock’s persistent glow, far from being a source of comfort, only serves to mark the passing of time, highlighting the speaker’s inability to escape their fears or find solace in sleep.

"Insomnia" is a deeply introspective poem that captures the essence of nocturnal anxiety and the way it magnifies all the fears and insecurities that lie beneath the surface during the day. Through its vivid imagery and raw honesty, Ostriker conveys the suffocating nature of these fears and the futile attempts to find comfort in a world that feels increasingly hostile and unforgiving. The poem speaks to the universal experience of lying awake in the dark, grappling with thoughts that refuse to be quieted, and the realization that some fears are so deeply ingrained that they cannot simply be wished away.

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