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GHAFLAH, by             Poet Analysis     Poet's Biography

June Jordan’s "Ghaflah" is a poignant and layered exploration of grief, memory, and the complex dynamics between a daughter and her mother. The term "ghaflah" in Islam refers to the sin of forgetfulness, which frames the poem’s meditation on the speaker’s struggle to reconcile with her mother’s life and death.

The poem opens with the visceral image of grief scraping at the speaker’s skin, immediately immersing the reader in the physical and emotional intensity of the speaker's loss. The command "Be a big girl!" serves as a refrain, echoing societal expectations to suppress emotion and maintain composure. This contrasts sharply with the speaker's raw, unresolved feelings.

The speaker’s relationship with her mother is characterized by a painful distance, as evidenced by the mother’s preference for minimal physical affection—only to disinfect or bandage. This lack of warmth is emblematic of the emotional restraint that pervades their interactions.

"I acknowledge nothing" and "I forget the mother of my hurt" are declarations that reveal the speaker’s conscious efforts to suppress painful memories. Yet, the act of forgetting is paradoxical, as it highlights the very memories the speaker wishes to erase. The reference to the mother’s suicide is stark and devastating, capturing the profound impact of this act on the speaker.

The repetition of "I do not remember" and "I forget" underscores the speaker’s struggle with selective memory. The memories that surface—burnt toast, tasteless meals, the mother’s generosity to neighbors—are tinged with a mix of resentment and longing. These mundane details reveal the mother's life of "slow compromise," a life constrained by societal expectations and personal sacrifices.

The poem’s middle section shifts to the speaker’s efforts to provide for her mother, saving money to buy her beautiful things she would never wear. This is a poignant illustration of the speaker’s yearning to uplift her mother, juxtaposed against the mother's inability or unwillingness to embrace beauty and joy.

The imagery of the mother’s "shuffling journey to a bus stop" conveys her weariness and vulnerability, while the speaker's readiness to defend her highlights a fierce protective instinct. Yet, this protection is ultimately futile against the internal struggles that lead to the mother’s suicide.

The poem crescendos with a reflection on prayer and fury. The speaker’s recollection of learning to pray from her mother, only to later forsake those prayers, symbolizes a deeper loss of faith and hope. The “blistering fury” and the abyss into which the speaker capsized signify the profound, unresolved anger and despair following her mother’s final act of compromise.

The wish to have found her mother alive, to have given her "both arms," is a heartbreaking expression of regret and longing for connection. The speaker’s admission of never forgiving her mother for going away reveals the enduring pain and betrayal felt.

Ultimately, the poem circles back to the opening image of grief and the refrain "Be a big girl!"—a reminder of the ongoing struggle to process and live with loss. The repeated assertion of not remembering anything, despite the vivid recollections shared, highlights the complex interplay between memory and denial.

Jordan’s "Ghaflah" masterfully captures the emotional turbulence of grief, the difficulty of remembering and forgetting, and the intricate bonds between mother and child. The poem’s structure, with its cyclical refrain and shifting memories, mirrors the inescapable and recurring nature of grief, making it a powerful exploration of loss and longing.


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